Things to do in the new year

Not really a resolution list, so to say...just more of a "To Do" list because I always skimp on resolving my resolutions.

~ Get "new" car
~ Make/buy latex or silicone mermaid tail with scales
~ Work on routine for professional mermaid act for parties
~ Work on stories

...that's all for now.

Same eyes, different time - disjointed notes

I feel very keenly that I am still the same little girl I was when I was about 6 or 7. Honestly, I don't feel I've changed much at all. Sure, I've grown up, but I'm the same. It's a strange feeling to see my position now with those same eyes...some of it's amazing and I'm delighted to have done something I used to dream about, but then again, there are times when my inner self just sits down and pouts about something I'm doing or have done. It's awful and I hate disappointing myself.
...
I was a mermaid. I mean, I am a mermaid, no doubt about that, but people actually acknowledged me as a mermaid for a whole weekend and I was absolutely beyond ecstasy. I think I want to get to the point where that is a bigger part of my life. I couldn't have been more happy doing that and there are many elements that combined to make that utter joy: friendly new people; happy, interested children; new setting... I wished it had never ended and now I'm curious as to how to make it continue. I really need to apply myself and get this to work.
...
On another note, I'm feeling stifled. I need change and I'm not sure where it should come in. Everything's screaming at me and I can't pinpoint where the majority of the voices are coming from so I can shake them up and silence them.
...
I'm almost done reading Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell for practically the billionth time and I'm just as enchanted by it as I was when I first picked it up. I highly suggest that you read it...whoever you are. I think I'll read through Susanna Clarke's The Ladies of Grace Adieu & Other Stories just to round out that fantastical feeling I get when I read through her masterpiece once again. I'd love to read something else from her, but I know almost exactly how she feels with regards to writing, although she's come much farther than I have, having actually finished writing a novel AND getting it published. I'm still only writing.
...
Just keep swimming, right? Well...what if I have the sudden urge to turn around and swim against the current I'm in now? Is that bad? Beneficial? Pointless? I guess I have to just turn and swim harder to find out.

Ethereal creatures of the deep

It's so neat to try and recreate that ethereal glow that the mermaids in Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides have. They shimmer and shine with something akin to moonglow and it is truly captivating.

Borrowed from Tatak Digitista

I learned through various searches that their on-set makeup artists used something from DuWop called Doubleglow7 that adds luminescence to any face. ...too bad I didn't find out about that earlier. Now I'm only three days away from driving to Georgia for the Southern Pirate Festival and I don't have time to wait for something to come in the mail. It's my fault because I wasn't really searching until much too late, but I don't think I'm going to be too far off with what I have already.

I'm going to be the first to admit that I really know nothing about makeup and its application. I've always really relied on my younger sister to help me there; she's really good with makeup and she's taken professional pictures before. I'm not really too intimidated, but I can get carried away with the buying, just trying to figure out what I need. I grilled my sister a week or so ago about what I needed to get a good, flawless look in pictures and she told me some items and even went shopping with me. Now, since I've not seen her recently, I've been searching on my own and have since found all sorts of tutorials and whatnot telling me the thousands of more "essentials" I need to create this amazing look that I want. Ugh. Too much. 

Instead of the Doubleglow7 (which I intend to buy later along with DuWop's lovely "Isla Sirena" palette of mermaid-themed makeups), I found something called Shimmering Facial Whip by e.l.f. I bought the little tube in the "Spotlight" shade and tried it last night...AMAZING! It looked just like shimmers of moonlight highlighting my shoulders and cheeks. It also had the bonus effect of making it look like I'd almost dried off after swimming, but was still slightly wet. I loved it and even contemplated wearing it to work today, but opted not to...as that's weird. I'll save it for my two days of mermaiding in Georgia. 

I know I won't look the same as those beauties in On Stranger Tides...heck, I'll barely have a shred of similarity, but at least I'll shine like they do in dark waters during the movie. I can't wait! 

Dazzled by Duran Duran

Can words really describe the overwhelming elation I felt during the Duran Duran concert in Clearwater on October 10? Not sufficiently, no; words can't, but that's all I have, so I'll try to work with it.

Outstanding. Superb. Amazing. Stunning. Dazzling.
Ooh...I like that one: dazzling. That fits very well.

It was the first concert I'd ever been to at Ruth Eckerd Hall, so I wasn't sure what to expect, venue-wise. I did know, however, that Duran Duran were going to be fantastic...I just didn't realize how fantastic they would really end up being.

This concert was the fourth time I've seen Duran Duran perform onstage. The first time was during the Astronaut tour, the second was when they performed with the Orlando Symphonic Orchestra and the third was in 2008 for their Red Carpet Massacre tour. So that's Tampa, Orlando, Orlando and now Clearwater. Also, that's 'with Andy Taylor,' 'with Andy Taylor,' 'without Andy Taylor' and, now (once again), 'without Andy Taylor.' With all those different variables and things taken out of consideration, I have to say that this latest performance was the best I'd seen of theirs yet.

In all aspects I was blown away like the Maxell advert guy. Simon's voice was incredible for having been so recently out of commission; John's bass was heart-stoppingly killer; Roger's drums were thrilling; Nick's keyboards were out of this world (as always, because he's an alien); and Dom's guitar riffs wailed. I really don't recall Andy ever being as good as Dom is now and I've seen PLENTY of videos.

Simon, Nick, John, and Roger were all laughing, playing with the crowd, joking with each other and playing brilliantly on top of that.

Ohhh...I'm all over the place! This was the set list:
BEFORE THE RAIN/PLANET EARTH/A VIEW TO A KILL/ALL YOU NEED IS NOW/ BLAME THE MACHINES/COME UNDONE/SAFE/REFLEX/LEOPARD/GIRL PANIC/TIGER TIGER/CARELESS MEMORIES/LEAVE A LIGHT ON/ORDINARY WORLD/NOTORIOUS/HUNGRY LIKE THE WOLF/SUNRISE (encore) WILD BOYS/RIO


When they opened the concert with "Before the Rain," I about fell over. My jaw dropped and my heart stopped for a second. Ryan thought it was funny and/or cute. My hands clasped together at my chest and I teared up when Simon began to sing (I wasn't the only one). That song is every expression of beauty that I can think of, song-wise; opening with that song was such a right choice. It set the perfect tone of the concert and then played with it by following it up with "Planet Earth."

Simon said at one point that they were the band that would make us party and they sure did; the whole sold-out venue was on their feet the entire time, dancing, singing, laughing, loving the show.

When they busted the instrumental "Tiger Tiger" out from their Seven and the Ragged Tiger album, I was floored and Ryan was pleased to say the least; he LOVES instrumentals and from the moment I first played him that track, he was hooked.

Everything was just so right about the concert. The weather was great, the drive was easy (except when we got lost before we got there, but even that wasn't bad at all; we just turned around and went the other way), the crowd was friendly and not raucous, the band was brilliant (as always)...everything was so right.

I will absolutely treasure every millisecond of the memories of this Duran Duran concert. In a sea of good evenings, this one was perfect.

Beautiful imagery

I can't stop thinking about the poem "Annabel Lee" by Edgar Allan Poe. It's come to the forefront of my mind because of singer/songwriter Sarah Jarosz. I found out about her just by chance and have been enchanted. Her music is lovely and some of it is downright haunting - sticking with you like a determined ghost. Two songs in particular have struck my fancy: "Run Away" and "Annabelle Lee." The former is the song I heard in a second on the radio while I was flipping through channels. I heard it and knew I was going to go home and buy her album, which I did. The latter song is the treasure I found on her album once I'd purchased it through iTunes.

Sarah's "Annabelle Lee" is Edgar Allan Poe's poem adapted to a beautiful song she wrote. I've always delighted in the macabre, and the poem "Annabel Lee" is just that. It's beautiful, sad and more than a little disturbing if you pay attention. Sarah's version is almost exactly that, but she adds some fantastic lines that add even more amazing imagery to the already magnificent original poem. In particular, these two:

They shut her up in a tomb
Below this kingdom by the sea
But no maiden's grave could sever my soul 
From the love she bore for me


and

For many years I've wandered
Through this kingdom by the sea
I've laid myself beside the bones
Of my beautiful Annabelle Lee


In Poe's original, he speaks of no angels above or demons below being able to sever his soul from Annabel's love, but Sarah Jarosz's "maiden's grave" is just enchanting. The same goes for the second quote. In the original, Poe's narrator lies "down by the side" of Annabel in her tomb, so you know that he's in her tomb, but she could be in a coffin for all we know. With Sarah's lyrics, however, you've got that narrator right next to his darling Annabelle's exposed bones. It makes you see him wandering all these years since his love's death just to finally give up and break into her silent tomb to lie down beside her bones and wait for death. It's hauntingly beautiful, isn't it?

I've gone for a bit without any good inspiration for my writing, but Sarah Jarosz's "Follow Me Down" album is proving a wonderful jolt for my mind and imagination. Close your eyes and just listen:

Interesting dream

So...I got a wig in the mail the other day. I'd ordered it from an eBay seller in China from whom I bought my lovely Kaylee wig earlier this year. It was supposed to be a gorgeous long, blonde wig, but that's not what came. When I opened the package, it was quite pretty, but the danged thing was yellow. You know, like anime yellow.  I like that and sometimes I think I want to buy a Sailor Moon wig in this particular shade of yellow, but that was not what was in the picture and that was not what I ordered for my mermaid character.

My mermaids have always been very natural, long haired creatures with little to no makeup, which is exactly what this new mermaid character will be. (However, I may opt for some makeup because I'll have my "makeup artist" sister with me.) I wanted her to have hair like this, but blonde:

Sooo...I got my money back from China (and still got to keep the wig, interestingly enough; who knows what I'm going to do with the yellow thing) and bought a new one this morning from California. I do hope it will be what I saw in the picture on eBay. These things are always iffy. 

Oh, and during that whole wig debacle, I had a dream about being a mermaid. That, in and of itself, is nothing new or remarkable (those are some of my favorite recurring dreams), but it actually pulled reality and some of my everyday interests into it as well. It was interesting to say the least, so here it is: 

I was a mermaid and I had a friend with me. We were in human form, walking along toward our destination, which was a stately manor in Georgia. However, on our way, we had to cross a river...a very wide, deep, murky brown river. With misgivings we slipped into the dingy water and knew immediately that something was wrong. There was another mermaid - a strange creature - living in the river, watching us too closely. As we swam faster to get to the other side, something sharp and ragged tugged at my fin. I could feel her harsh, questioning thoughts and possessive nature all around me as she let go. It was a warning, but we had to get out fast; she wasn't going to let me go a second time. My friend tried to reach out to her with her thoughts, but was raked along her side with claw-like nails without so much as a glimpse at the creature. Faster and faster we swam and, just as we could feel we has overstayed our grace period, we reached the other side of the river and clambered out of reach of the water. Looking back, our hearts beating almost too quickly, we held onto our tails and watched as a silvery flash flicked the surface of the water just a few yards from the edge - much too close. The negative feelings that we'd felt in the creature's water lingered as long as we were wet, so we stretched out and dried ourselves with the bright sun. It wasn't pleasant, drying out so completely, but it had to be done. Right as we were beginning to dry a little too much, a familiar voice called to us from the mansion; we jolted up, having almost forgotten about our quest, and dashed into the mansion. 

Inside was large and hollow. Of course there were all sorts of appropriate furnishings and trappings for an antebellum Georgian manor house, but something was off. There was a television, a gramophone, a telephone and a few other modernities that threw me off. Ignoring the strangeness, I led my fellow mermaid upstairs to where the only sounds in the house were coming from: a bedroom. We heard laughter and the muffled sound of a television show behind the closed door and, when we opened it, I wasn't surprised at all anymore. There were Captain Jack Sparrow and Captain Barbossa (before his promotion) sitting around a computer, laughing. Sparrow looked up to see us in the doorway and beckoned, his eyes bright and playful.

"Hector and I just HAD to show this to you two! We thought you'd love it with your love of pretties and things..." he said. Barbossa just kept chuckling to himself. 

Coming around to the other side of the monitor, I saw an episode of "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic" playing. The bright colors and moving pictures fascinated both myself and my friend and we watched, enraptured. It seemed familiar somehow and, next thing I knew, I was in a clawed-foot bathtub, being kept wet by a running showerhead. There were agitated voices in the hallway and I felt scared, like I should flee. I tried to move, but I couldn't and as I tried to figure out why, I woke up. 

Waiting with hope

Sooo...I'm going to be a mermaid in October (if my contract ever makes it to me) AND I'm going to see Duran Duran in concert AGAIN! Oh...AND I should be getting a new car (to me - not an actual brand new car). I just wish all these wonderful things didn't cost so much. I guess that's part of life, right? "Live, pay taxes, die." Doesn't matter how you live, you still have to pay to live and pay taxes.

The mermaid thing I mentioned before: I'm going to be a mermaid at a pirate festival in Georgia. I'll be sitting somewhere and the kids and people will come to me to take pictures and chat with me, the real live mermaid. I just bought a lovely long, blonde wig from China and I have the tail; all I need to work on now is the top and I have a fantastic idea for that one. I think my sister is going to come with me and be my personal makeup artist - I just have to pay for her meals. That's a fair trade; I suck at makeup. I really hope she can get off work with me. It's going to be awesome!

The week before I transform into a tail-flapping mermaid for a weekend, Ryan and I will be attending a Duran Duran concert for their "All You Need Is Now" tour! I still can't believe that I'm going to a DD concert with someone else; I've only ever gone by myself. Heck, I even went to Flight of the Conchords by myself. The standard procedure is that my parents drop me off, I enjoy, they pick me up and go home. Fun, but lonely. I mean, there are thousands of people at DD concerts and we're all fans and friends in Duran, but it's still lonely. This time will be totally different and I can't wait. Oh, AND by that time I will be a card-carrying GOLD member of their fan club with a special edition t-shirt, messenger bag and other sundries. I had to pay extra to join, but it was worth it because I got great seats for the concert during the pre-sale for members only. Well, now that I am a member, I am that much closer to saving up for a meet and greet with the band. That's my secret plan. Don't tell anyone!

As for the car, well, my ride right now is a 1990 Oldsmobile Cutlass Ciera SL. Color: rust. No, really. Not rust-colored. It's made of rust. It used to be mostly maroon, but that's not the case anymore. No air conditioning and the automatic passenger window is practically dead when I have to drive almost an hour home every day in the awful Florida summer sun. Luckily I can keep my mind off the worst of it by turning up my iPod and singing along, but sometimes it's barely bearable. I've had it since 2004 and the honest truth is that I need a new car. Unfortunately, I'm awful with money. I've made a resolution to do better with it, but I'm not there yet. Luckily, my amazing boyfriend (who also happens to be a mechanic) wants to buy a nice used one for me outright and have me pay him back. We've been searching for a few days now and I think I found my dream car: a green Kia Rio (not blue-silver, but I can't afford to be too picky) with air and manual windows. Unfortunately, it's an hour away from our house and we have to wait until the weekend to go see it...IF it's still there. We have to call them tonight to see if they even still have the car. I hope so. I also hope they don't sell it before we get to it. Here's to hoping, wishing and waiting.